I told my friend A. that I was planning to write a book (I even have a title for it) on the topic of preacher's children that are grandchildren of Jews converting back to Judaism, or maybe just the non-Jewish grandchild of a Jew that converts back, and she suggested that I take notes throughout the conversion process so that I can reflect back on that during the writing of the book when I am post conversion and ready to record it. I can't recall if I have really taken a full accounting of notes as to how I got to the point I am now in having decided to convert, or whether I've kept that really hidden from the world. Some of you may know all this about me already, some of you will be bored in that case. The rest of you are in for a treat I suppose as I decided maybe I should use my blog to keep notes. I'd like to do a few posts about this, and in kind of randomized order I suppose as I don't always think linear. I welcome comments, questions, and other things posted on here. So long as you don't reveal who I really am. I will try to answer your questions in subsequent posts. I realize this is non-political, but frankly it doesn't matter politics can only take up so much of one's time.
I have always felt like I was born into the wrong family. I always felt more at home in the Jewish community. When I was a child most of my friends were Jewish. I can remember as a 9 year old child asking my father why everyone else lit a menorah and we didn't. Lucky for me, he went out and got one for me and we lit it. I used to try to talk to my grandfather about being Jewish, but he refused to discuss the subject and would make up things when I'd ask him questions. I used to ask all the rabbis I had access to by virtue of the area we lived in and my dad's position all kinds of questions, I even stumped a few of them.
I grew up though, not really even knowing that people could convert to being Jewish. I went on with my life, went to a Christian college, married my Christian husband, raising our Christian children. Still feeling like something was missing, so I asked the Chassidic community near by if there were activities I could participate in as a non-Jew. I even explained about my heritage, and I was welcomed warmly. The rabbi was the first person to suggest to me conversion. That was in January of 2008 when I met him face to face and we were talking about my background, he very quickly suggested that I convert. He didn't say it with pressure or anything. I was really excited and felt blessed by this. He said I needed to keep my name though, which made me feel sort of sad, I never liked my name and I'd like to change it.
When my marriage fell apart, and with it so many other aspects of my community so to speak I decided to start attending synagogue fairly regularly and have felt very at home in this community. After some time I decided that I don't want to be an outsider forever and I can always come back and visit this community as my new family and my sort of mother community so to speak. They will all wish me well it seems, one woman even blessed me that I be a good convert etc. I want what these people have, and though I can never be a Jew from birth I can choose to take on the challenge.
So, this is the start of when I decided to convert. I think it is the culmination of everything from my childhood and maybe even before my childhood. This is an executive summary of course of these matters, but I wanted to just include a bit of a note regarding this. I'm looking forward to having a topic to do a series of blog posts on outside of the usual.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Monday, September 29, 2008
Who the FUCK is Henry Paulsen sleeping with?
If Henry Paulsen was a woman and behaved in this kind of microcephalic manner, people would be asking who the fuck did she sleep with or something to that effect, but because he is a man no one dares asks this question. The idea that this bail out failure is a surprise is shockingly ridiculous, as clearly the public would urge their representatives to vote against this kind of measure. The first presidential debate however, indicates just how out of touch with reality the people running this country amok are. So, I ask who the FUCK are these people sleeping with?
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Mourning
I am mourning this time for my friend, Les. Les was an amazing man, and I will always remember the way he cared for me when many others did not. He was very interested in how I was and what I was doing. He was also interested in the things that had happened to me and what was going on with those things. I suspect he was instrumental behind the scenes at getting some people to realize how they screwed up. I miss Les and I am having a harder day than I had expected. This is also my best friend's birthday though so it is a mixed bag.
Les and I were on the health ministry together at my former church and I always appreciated the way he participated in the meetings and in our lives. He will be missed by all who were blessed with his life.
Les and I were on the health ministry together at my former church and I always appreciated the way he participated in the meetings and in our lives. He will be missed by all who were blessed with his life.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
The Republican Convention
I've been bored out of my mind with this convention. Here's some of my opinions however. I can appreciate Joe Lieberman's speech and really enjoyed the way he presented himself. I think he was very classy and supported McCain without putting down Obama or making himself look like an asshole. I can appreciate Rudy's point related to the sexism card, and how come no one asks Obama about having enough time to be President and a father...no one ever thinks about that, so I will give that point to Rudy. I can appreciate Palin's feelings about Obama and the media etc. However, I wish Sarah Palin had been given a better speech. I think that the speech they gave her lacked any substance at all, I never heard anything about any issues that were significant. One jab about Obama wanting to meet with Iran, well Reagan met with Iran too so let's get over ourselves.
Another thing that I have found lacking is anyone under the age of 35. It seems that these people are all quite a bit older than those that went to the Democratic convention, and whereas I am sure the base has been energized I was bored. I was never part of the base. I have always been a Libertarian Republican, and now I just vote Libertarian because I feel the Republican party is going in a direction that I don't want to go down. I think it is unreasonable to be touting this speech as a wonderful speech. Yes, it was well delivered, but there was very little quality to be worthy of extraction. I hope that McCain's speech tonight will lay out a plan to move ahead, because I feel a real hunger to understand what the party is thinking.
Until next time, I am still voting Libertarian it's the only way to take back this country.
Another thing that I have found lacking is anyone under the age of 35. It seems that these people are all quite a bit older than those that went to the Democratic convention, and whereas I am sure the base has been energized I was bored. I was never part of the base. I have always been a Libertarian Republican, and now I just vote Libertarian because I feel the Republican party is going in a direction that I don't want to go down. I think it is unreasonable to be touting this speech as a wonderful speech. Yes, it was well delivered, but there was very little quality to be worthy of extraction. I hope that McCain's speech tonight will lay out a plan to move ahead, because I feel a real hunger to understand what the party is thinking.
Until next time, I am still voting Libertarian it's the only way to take back this country.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Alaska...
Alaska and it's 3 electoral college votes are now center stage. I'm not really sure how to take that in light of the electrifying Democratic convention. Even I have to concede I was fascinated with the convention, and I am a Libertarian, and don't even consider myself to be a democrat (odd contradiction I know). Like probably 99% of the other people watching the political scene I figured that McCain would ask Joe Lieberman to run with him, and maybe he did and Joe refused, who knows? I'm not sure I'd run with McCain either were I in the position of Joe Lieberman. Neither here nor there I suppose, we will never know how Sarah Palin was the one picked for the ticket. It does seem bizarre though to pick someone from Alaska, I mean 3 electoral votes isn't much, and she's so unknown I doubt she can help with a lot of things like independent voters etc. Course, I am an internationalist, and I thank God every day that I am an internationalist and I don't need to worry about these pesky domestic political issues.
I think the choice of Sarah Palin is an interesting choice, and I am rather intrigued by this choice for a number of reasons. First, I am intrigued because true to form the Feminist backlash has begun. I find it intriguing that the same women that wanted to have Hillary Clinton in the White house (I am still confused, someone please tell me what qualified Hillary for the presidency? Oh right she was married to the president...hmmmm...I am so not buying that snake oil.) are insulted by the choice of Palin. What's wrong with the choice of Palin? She seems like a decent person to me, I mean the whole thing is bizarre because she isn't on the same name recognition level with Mit Romney, but then again plenty of people would fit that bill. Palin helps to score McCain points with the Republican base that he is having so much trouble keeping up with. It also makes him look really good to the public, because now he too can talk about making history, especially if by some weird twist of fate he manages to pull out a victory (I'm not going to hold my breath and expect that to happen).
Palin, I think also causes another interesting twist. Palin forces women to look at their motivations for voting. I think this is a fundamental problem with US politics. The feminists are always about electing women, but only THEIR own women. A woman like myself, or like Elizabeth Dole is frowned upon by the "feminists" and now we have women saying it is insulting that Palin was chosen. Women are 51% of the population, does it really matter how insulting it is? Some women will vote for McCain and some will vote for Obama it is just the way it is. When you are more than half the population you're going to vote in different ways. Course men don't vote uniformly either, and if they did I have had a number of men tell me how Palin is really good looking and they hope she becomes V.P. So clearly we know how that'd turn out. This brings up another point, are these women insulted because she is a beautiful woman? What if she were ugly would it matter so much? Just like would Obama be a rock star if he were White?
Another interesting thing about this choice is that it's ALASKA. I mean how many Americans can find Alaska on the map? I doubt many people outside of Alaska really know where it is. I applied for a few jobs up in Alaska, I thought it might be fun to live there, and they have a shortage of women up there, and a large Russian influence. Alaska is now important for the first time in the history of this country. I mean sure it is important for all the resources we robbed the Russians of when we bought it, but it's also now important because it is now the home state of a possible V.P. of the U.S. and for the first time ever. I can't recall one president of vice president that was from Alaska, can you? I wonder what it must feel like for the Alaskans right now, I've been trying to get in contact with a few Alaskans I know, but haven't gotten through to them.
I think it's both brilliant and risky to choose Palin, and even though I will most likely not vote for McCain, because I plan to vote Libertarian. I think it will be interesting to see what this roll of the dice brings not only to McCain's campaign but to elections and politics in the future as well. This election has been a historical one for sure, and with the exception of my thoughts on Lieberman I have been right in all my analysis of it. Oh and by the way the 88th anniversary of women getting the right to vote that the Democrats were carrying on about, that was under a Republican Congress...so I guess the Dems can't say they are the progressive party on that end of things.
I'd like to thank McCain for the choice of Palin, I find it to be an interesting one and as I said I am fascinated by it for a lot of reasons. I'd like to thank Gov. Palin for accepting the nomination, I think it was courageous on her part and I also think it'll make things a lot more interesting.
May the best ticket win, let the games begin!
I think the choice of Sarah Palin is an interesting choice, and I am rather intrigued by this choice for a number of reasons. First, I am intrigued because true to form the Feminist backlash has begun. I find it intriguing that the same women that wanted to have Hillary Clinton in the White house (I am still confused, someone please tell me what qualified Hillary for the presidency? Oh right she was married to the president...hmmmm...I am so not buying that snake oil.) are insulted by the choice of Palin. What's wrong with the choice of Palin? She seems like a decent person to me, I mean the whole thing is bizarre because she isn't on the same name recognition level with Mit Romney, but then again plenty of people would fit that bill. Palin helps to score McCain points with the Republican base that he is having so much trouble keeping up with. It also makes him look really good to the public, because now he too can talk about making history, especially if by some weird twist of fate he manages to pull out a victory (I'm not going to hold my breath and expect that to happen).
Palin, I think also causes another interesting twist. Palin forces women to look at their motivations for voting. I think this is a fundamental problem with US politics. The feminists are always about electing women, but only THEIR own women. A woman like myself, or like Elizabeth Dole is frowned upon by the "feminists" and now we have women saying it is insulting that Palin was chosen. Women are 51% of the population, does it really matter how insulting it is? Some women will vote for McCain and some will vote for Obama it is just the way it is. When you are more than half the population you're going to vote in different ways. Course men don't vote uniformly either, and if they did I have had a number of men tell me how Palin is really good looking and they hope she becomes V.P. So clearly we know how that'd turn out. This brings up another point, are these women insulted because she is a beautiful woman? What if she were ugly would it matter so much? Just like would Obama be a rock star if he were White?
Another interesting thing about this choice is that it's ALASKA. I mean how many Americans can find Alaska on the map? I doubt many people outside of Alaska really know where it is. I applied for a few jobs up in Alaska, I thought it might be fun to live there, and they have a shortage of women up there, and a large Russian influence. Alaska is now important for the first time in the history of this country. I mean sure it is important for all the resources we robbed the Russians of when we bought it, but it's also now important because it is now the home state of a possible V.P. of the U.S. and for the first time ever. I can't recall one president of vice president that was from Alaska, can you? I wonder what it must feel like for the Alaskans right now, I've been trying to get in contact with a few Alaskans I know, but haven't gotten through to them.
I think it's both brilliant and risky to choose Palin, and even though I will most likely not vote for McCain, because I plan to vote Libertarian. I think it will be interesting to see what this roll of the dice brings not only to McCain's campaign but to elections and politics in the future as well. This election has been a historical one for sure, and with the exception of my thoughts on Lieberman I have been right in all my analysis of it. Oh and by the way the 88th anniversary of women getting the right to vote that the Democrats were carrying on about, that was under a Republican Congress...so I guess the Dems can't say they are the progressive party on that end of things.
I'd like to thank McCain for the choice of Palin, I find it to be an interesting one and as I said I am fascinated by it for a lot of reasons. I'd like to thank Gov. Palin for accepting the nomination, I think it was courageous on her part and I also think it'll make things a lot more interesting.
May the best ticket win, let the games begin!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Demagoges
The Democrats are having their convention this week, and it's making me sick. I mean not only am I sick with a cold, or sick because this is my 1 year anniversary of not being able to see my kids, or a whole bunch of other things, but it seems to me that the Democrats are more hypocritical than in previous years. The Democrats are the "party of the people" yet Nancy Pelosi REFUSED to call a special session of the House in order to address the problem of people losing their houses. The Democrats are the party of the people, yet they don't care about the people. Hillary Clinton thought this was her turn and that she would be president, and she is just plain mean spirited, ungracious, and the Clintons together are BITCHY about the situation with Obama. Obama, who is the candidate that was chosen to be sacrificed so that the Clintons could maintain their stranglehold on the party came out in the end and beat the Clinton machine, and yet he is the one being vilified by the Clintons, why didn't he ask her advice on the VP, etc. I mean really, if I lose a race am I required to be asked by the winner about things? Clearly the people have spoken, and Hillary has no more experience than Obama does. Bill Clinton should really get out of the whole scene, frankly so many of these people are washed up it's not even funny.
They're not attacking McCain nor are the Republicans defending McCain. In part this is because it's a Democrat year, and as such mostly Democrats will be elected, but also it is because this is a Dole vs. Clinton rematch with Clinton being played by Obama and Dole being played by McCain. Neither of these candidates really wants a major contest in terms of mudslinging etc, but McCain can't afford such a contest because he doesn't know how to compete with Obama. Obama is competing on a new playing field, he's using the internet to his advantage and doing a whole bunch of other things in an attempt to improve his competitiveness, including the text message announcement of Joe Biden. McCain, has no idea how to compete in this context and the Republican machine doesn't know how to compete this way because they haven't put the effort into learning how to do these things.
Hillary's speech last night was I think a poor attempt at supporting Obama, and she is setting the stage for a hopefully successful campagin in 2012. I think she will continue to be a thorn in the Democrat party side until she is crowned the imperial ruler for all time. This is of course a very sad situation and I feel badly for Obama, Clinton, and my country. This is the ONLY post I will do with the Clintons in it because I frankly want them all to be out of the news and my life. The whole thing with Chelsea being front and center all the time makes me ill as well.
They're not attacking McCain nor are the Republicans defending McCain. In part this is because it's a Democrat year, and as such mostly Democrats will be elected, but also it is because this is a Dole vs. Clinton rematch with Clinton being played by Obama and Dole being played by McCain. Neither of these candidates really wants a major contest in terms of mudslinging etc, but McCain can't afford such a contest because he doesn't know how to compete with Obama. Obama is competing on a new playing field, he's using the internet to his advantage and doing a whole bunch of other things in an attempt to improve his competitiveness, including the text message announcement of Joe Biden. McCain, has no idea how to compete in this context and the Republican machine doesn't know how to compete this way because they haven't put the effort into learning how to do these things.
Hillary's speech last night was I think a poor attempt at supporting Obama, and she is setting the stage for a hopefully successful campagin in 2012. I think she will continue to be a thorn in the Democrat party side until she is crowned the imperial ruler for all time. This is of course a very sad situation and I feel badly for Obama, Clinton, and my country. This is the ONLY post I will do with the Clintons in it because I frankly want them all to be out of the news and my life. The whole thing with Chelsea being front and center all the time makes me ill as well.
Friday, August 15, 2008
You Can Torment the Bear as Long as You Stay in Your Own House....
So the Russian proverb goes. This is evident in what is happening with Russia, Georgia, and perhaps Poland will be next if I am to believe the articles in the news that I've seen today. It's ridiculous of course that Russia would go after Poland, but apparently Russia has threatened to do this. I am sure there are a number of reasons for this, but I don't care to give an opinion on the subject, other than to say it would be ridiculous to go after Poland.
Russians have lived by this proverb for centuries at the very least, and I have lived by it in my own life as well. It's because I love this saying, I think it is great. I think it is also very true, if you think about bears and the nature of them. Consequently this can be said of bears as well, they can torment things as long as they stay in their own house.
Russians have lived by this proverb for centuries at the very least, and I have lived by it in my own life as well. It's because I love this saying, I think it is great. I think it is also very true, if you think about bears and the nature of them. Consequently this can be said of bears as well, they can torment things as long as they stay in their own house.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Political Change?
What does this ad tells us about the current campaign? My dear friend at The Valley said to me a while back he was afraid that we would have a Dole vs Clinton rematch this election. Another wise man in my life said no, this is Dole vs Kennedy. All I can say, is it is Dole vs someone, anyone and this is a strange election on a number of levels.
First of all, studies have shown over and over again that the American public, and specifically the segment of the population that votes, doesn't like negative ads. People of course still run them, because they like to use out of date strategies etc. They also don't know how to run a non-negative campaign and I commend Obama for the way he has conducted his campaign thus far, and for the way he has dealt with this ad, asking if this is the best McCain can do etc. I think this is the better approach and in the end it will bring him more credibility and probably more votes with the public.
This is also a strange campaign because I can't really remember a time in history when people were comparing people to celebrities in the manner that is being done during this current campaign. Aside from the "Gumby guy" from Mass. phenomenon: Dukakis, Kerry, Romney, etc. that is always kind of a strange thing, doesn't that state have non-gumby characters?
Being an internationalist I never really give in depth commentary on elections in the US, but in the absence of my darling I need to make a commentary that he'd be proud of.
This campaign seems to be running the gambit when it comes to new/change and also when it comes to the same old shit different day, and everything in between. For example this McCain ad is both same shit different day, and new. I can't remember the last time these two celebrities were used in an ad can you?
Also, the internet is much more involved in this election than in previous campaigns. Obama has the advantage on this end compared to any of the other candidates. Hopefully, his campaign won't be hurt by the Edwards fiasco. What a waste of time and energy that is.
This campaign is always coming up with ways to make my stomach turn, and I am a political scientist.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Responsibility
It seems in this day and age there is a lack of responsibility, both personal and societal. I find this to be a disturbing trend and I don't know what to do about the situation. I can't really control societal trends, I can only control what I do, but I am heartened by the fact that my beloved one recognizes he needs to take responsibility for some of the situations in his life right now. It gives me hope for the future of humanity that at least one individual sees these things.
I am disheartened by the activities of former communities of mine. I went to a meeting at a place I left last year and I realized how much these people are on crack etc. It just blew my mind how irresponsible they were behaving and how bad the planning is there. Thankfully I no longer need to trouble myself with these events. I am heartened that my attempt to take responsibility at this meeting was recognized by a woman who is not far from death's door.
I am also disheartened by the idea that people are still trying to run my life. How long must I endure this? How long must I sing the same songs of people trying to run my life etc? I am trying not to be pissed off about the situation, but it really makes me crazy that no one wants to take responsibility for what they did, but they want to run my life still.
I think the attitude is that I am the idiot child incapable of responsibility because then it makes them feel powerful etc. My life however, just like yours is not for anyone to power play with. It is just very sad that people can't just live in peace with each other.
I am disheartened by the activities of former communities of mine. I went to a meeting at a place I left last year and I realized how much these people are on crack etc. It just blew my mind how irresponsible they were behaving and how bad the planning is there. Thankfully I no longer need to trouble myself with these events. I am heartened that my attempt to take responsibility at this meeting was recognized by a woman who is not far from death's door.
I am also disheartened by the idea that people are still trying to run my life. How long must I endure this? How long must I sing the same songs of people trying to run my life etc? I am trying not to be pissed off about the situation, but it really makes me crazy that no one wants to take responsibility for what they did, but they want to run my life still.
I think the attitude is that I am the idiot child incapable of responsibility because then it makes them feel powerful etc. My life however, just like yours is not for anyone to power play with. It is just very sad that people can't just live in peace with each other.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Mourning
What a mess! Israel tries to do the right thing in a prisoner exchange, hoping to get back live soldiers, and ends up getting back 2 dead bodies on the day we celebrate one of the Chabad Rebbes (what is the plural for this word?) getting released from jail. What a bittersweet moment that must have been. Especially to find that one of the prisoners exchanged is a cold blooded murderer of children even in this horrible conflict.
I wish I could say something comforting about this situation, but there isn't anything comforting to say. This is a terrible tragedy for the families of these soldiers, for the state of Israel as a whole, and for the world wide community of my people everywhere. We can all feel these events in our bones. What happens to one member of the body is felt elsewhere in the body, this is true of us as a people as well.
My tribute to these soldiers is to include some videos that I hope you will watch, and I hope will bring some healing. I am sure that this battle isn't over, nor is the war.
You'll have to look for the English version of this last song, I couldn't find it this morning, but I have previous found it. Ani Yachol means "I can" and the lyrics to this song are really fitting for a soldier, it talks about being able to do all kinds of things. I hope you enjoy the videos, and never forget.
I wish I could say something comforting about this situation, but there isn't anything comforting to say. This is a terrible tragedy for the families of these soldiers, for the state of Israel as a whole, and for the world wide community of my people everywhere. We can all feel these events in our bones. What happens to one member of the body is felt elsewhere in the body, this is true of us as a people as well.
My tribute to these soldiers is to include some videos that I hope you will watch, and I hope will bring some healing. I am sure that this battle isn't over, nor is the war.
You'll have to look for the English version of this last song, I couldn't find it this morning, but I have previous found it. Ani Yachol means "I can" and the lyrics to this song are really fitting for a soldier, it talks about being able to do all kinds of things. I hope you enjoy the videos, and never forget.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Atonement
Wow, has it really been almost a month since my last post? It feels like it was just yesterday. Anyway, this is a personal post because I am frustrated about a lot of things in my personal life right now and I don't want to spend time thinking about other things.
A fundamental concept in religion is atonement, although I think the Jews do this best. Christians tend to say that atonement isn't relevant because Jesus died for their sins. Jews at least work for this, and I'm not quite sure what the Muslim perspective is on the topic, or that of any other religion for that matter. What I can tell you is that this seems to be a concept that is misunderstood.
The concept requires a recognition of a mistake made, followed by an idea of how to make it right and a request that the other person both forgive and also accept the gesture. This requires a lot of effort both for the atonee and the atoner, and yes atonee is a new word I just made up. The process of atonement needs to start with the person that made the mistake in the first place though, and people need to respect each other during the process.
I am finding myself frustrated by a lack of atonement in my life. I have been painted with the Lilith brush and expected to own the mistakes of others and atone for the mistakes of others, but others don't seem to understand the impact that they have on my life. In fact they don't even see my life all they see is their own reality. I find this to be a very sad process within my life. It is death affirming, whereas atonement can be life affirming and is life affirming, to withhold it and then blame the person who has been wronged seems to me a huge mistake and very death gripping.
I prefer to be surrounded by life affirming influences and so I have decided to sever all ties with the death crew. This is also a death affirming decision on some level, although over all it is life affirming.
So, I have decided as my "atonement" for all the wrongs that have been committed against me, but supposedly are my fault that I'd like to start my own company. Now I am just trying to figure out how to make that work and what kind of company I'd like to create, for example product or service and industry etc.
A fundamental concept in religion is atonement, although I think the Jews do this best. Christians tend to say that atonement isn't relevant because Jesus died for their sins. Jews at least work for this, and I'm not quite sure what the Muslim perspective is on the topic, or that of any other religion for that matter. What I can tell you is that this seems to be a concept that is misunderstood.
The concept requires a recognition of a mistake made, followed by an idea of how to make it right and a request that the other person both forgive and also accept the gesture. This requires a lot of effort both for the atonee and the atoner, and yes atonee is a new word I just made up. The process of atonement needs to start with the person that made the mistake in the first place though, and people need to respect each other during the process.
I am finding myself frustrated by a lack of atonement in my life. I have been painted with the Lilith brush and expected to own the mistakes of others and atone for the mistakes of others, but others don't seem to understand the impact that they have on my life. In fact they don't even see my life all they see is their own reality. I find this to be a very sad process within my life. It is death affirming, whereas atonement can be life affirming and is life affirming, to withhold it and then blame the person who has been wronged seems to me a huge mistake and very death gripping.
I prefer to be surrounded by life affirming influences and so I have decided to sever all ties with the death crew. This is also a death affirming decision on some level, although over all it is life affirming.
So, I have decided as my "atonement" for all the wrongs that have been committed against me, but supposedly are my fault that I'd like to start my own company. Now I am just trying to figure out how to make that work and what kind of company I'd like to create, for example product or service and industry etc.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
What is Wrong with this Picture?
I'm watching CNN and like 10 minutes ago they had a story about who would be a better first Lady, Cindy McCain or Michelle Obama? I can't help but ask WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY? We're electing a president not a first lady. I don't really care that much about the first lady, it's the president I am concerned with. I understand the first lady is a counselor etc for the president, but I am more concerned about the decisions a president would make not some sort of stupid who'd be better at being first lady. Who really cares? Since when does this need to be a contest between the spouses? No one interestingly enough asked who'd be better Michelle Obama or Bill Clinton did they? Bill Clinton would look pretty bad in a dress and high heels!
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Why Obama Should Get the Nomination
I'm sitting in my favorite coffee shop and I've been busy with some other stuff. I started thinking that I should maybe address this topic. Clinton is a qualified candidate, and it's not that I think she's incompetent. She's not incompetent, but the country isn't ready for her yet. Black men have always gotten things before women, the right to vote etc. Why should the presidency be any different. Furthermore, Obama is younger than Clinton and McCain both. I'm of the opinion that the country will elect a Democrat this year, even if I think we should elect someone that isn't tied to a chimpanzee party. Obama would be the best qualified person to elect. This is because he's younger so he has fresh ideas and blood, he has some experience, but let's face it no one has experience as president during their first term anyway so the whole experience card is a joke. I also think that Obama is much more likable than Clinton or McCain. This is a factor in electing a president even if people don't want to acknowledge this idea. It is difficult to vote for som I theone one doesn't like. Young people like Obama, and he's very inspirational to a lot of people. He makes people believe in themselves again and in the country, often times I've thought he sounds a lot like Kennedy. I hope he won't end up being shot like Kennedy, especially since he has to deal with Clinton and her reference to the other Kennedy. I think Obama will make a fine president, and who knows I might let some of you out there convince me to vote for him.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Pandora's Box
My dearly beloved makes the point that I live in Michigan. This is true as I have lived in Michigan for the last 12 years, or 3 election seasons to use his time measurement system. Upon arrival to Michigan I found an in with the college Republicans at Hope College and actually did some volunteer work for the Dole for President campaign. Not a surprise really since the Dole campaign changed my life in more ways that I can really comment about in a brief post.
When I came to Michigan it was still under the Engler Administration. I can't comment much about this since I didn't particularly pay attention to local politics when I came here. After a while though I was forced to pay attention by my belief in eternal vigilance and by my residence. My beloved will tell you I am hyper-responsible when it comes to matters of a civic nature.
Now, we have a clusterfuck and the question has been asked "How can Democrats run a country if they can't run an election?" Well first of all, neither party is qualified to run a country in my opinion. This has been proven time and time again in Michigan and in other states. Democrats and Republicans are the opposite side of the same coin and they're a bunch of jackasses. I think the Republicans should also adopt the jackass as their symbol based on the last 8 years, or maybe even a monkey. A monkey might be more fitting actually.
Democratic senator Carl Levin, from Michigan called the system for getting a nominee "irrational". It's irrational on several levels. First of all, I am loathed to admit I agree with him elections should be held on the same day in all states instead of having it spread out over months. This does give an advantage to earlier states, I don't care what logic one wants to argue, it's a bad system and that's true on the Republican side as well. Second, I've long said that people should run regardless of party (like in the old days) and the person with the most votes would be president and the one with the 2nd most votes would be vice president, again regardless of party. This is because I agree with Washington that political parties are of the devil, that's not quite what he said but it's the same idea. Michigan then came up with a "compromise", which isn't really a compromise by any means of the imagination.
Under the Michigan compromise, the Michigan and Florida delegations are seated but they get half a vote. What's the point in half a vote, does anyone else see the irrationality here? It's still disenfranchising the votes of both states, but now we have to put on a face that we're happy with the idea. The party wants to claim this is a move towards unity, but is it really? I mean the Michigan delegates were divided in a way that makes very little sense to me. Obama gets 59 and Clinton gets 69, but they're each worth half a vote. Florida had an equally ridiculous concept for its delegates. It would have been more rational to divide out all the delegates equally and have them either worth half a vote or give them full voting rights. After all Obama followed the rules and shouldn't be penalized for this.
A much more rational system for nominating would be to just have conventions. Have delegates to the convention and no primaries and let them pick the nominee. This way people can vote in the general election, but everyone can vote on an equal footing, and winner takes all is much better than proportional divisions. These proportional divisions are ridiculous, and I feel the same way about the super delegates.
Pandora's box has been opened though and this leaves this election season with a bad taste. It's unfortunate, because the reality is Obama is very capable and it's not his fault these things have gone on, Clinton is an opportunist and will either have him assassinated or will cry foul play all the way to the Supreme Court like someone else we know to get the nomination. She will do whatever she has to do now that she has been given a foot hold, plus the number of delegates needed has now been increased in an attempt to level the playing field. Why level it when she is still over 170 delegates behind? It's basic historic precedent, black men have always gotten things before women and why should being elected president be any different.
Obama's administration doesn't strike me as being any worse than what we've had for the last 8 years, but I'm not sure who he'd want his cabinet for various positions so I can't really comment a lot here. Clinton's administration would probably mirror her husband's and NAFTA was a bad idea then and is a bad idea now. Michigan was the 2nd hardest hit with NAFTA losses and it's completely unfair that the issue was handled the way it was under Clinton and Bush both. I could say the same for the way each president has handled the war on terrorism as well, but I'll save that.
The whole electoral process has become irrational in this country and now we have irrational delegate counts, we now increase delegate counts for the Hell of it etc. We do all sorts of ridiculous things in the name of trying to be fair and give everyone a voice, but having state conventions on the same day, and then having a national convention to make the nomination official would be a much more rational plan, or even having different state conventions and not releasing the results until the national conventions. Primaries and then conventions seem to be antiquated ways for determining a nominee, especially when neither is productive and the season gets stretched out so much.
I for one, can't wait for this election season to end. I am sick and tired of the whole thing and I am relieved that my party doesn't stoop to these levels. These tactics are just an example of why both parties are made up of microcephalic pissant peons that should fix their cranial rectal inversion.
In conclusion, when I ran for office as a Libertarian we didn't have these kinds of issues. I think though that Obama shouldn't be penalized for the party being a bunch of morons. Obama and McCain are both capable and should be evaluated on their own merits, I just prefer Libertarian ideals and will be voting accordingly. Statements that I am throwing away my vote by doing so will be removed.
Until next time RAF :)
When I came to Michigan it was still under the Engler Administration. I can't comment much about this since I didn't particularly pay attention to local politics when I came here. After a while though I was forced to pay attention by my belief in eternal vigilance and by my residence. My beloved will tell you I am hyper-responsible when it comes to matters of a civic nature.
Now, we have a clusterfuck and the question has been asked "How can Democrats run a country if they can't run an election?" Well first of all, neither party is qualified to run a country in my opinion. This has been proven time and time again in Michigan and in other states. Democrats and Republicans are the opposite side of the same coin and they're a bunch of jackasses. I think the Republicans should also adopt the jackass as their symbol based on the last 8 years, or maybe even a monkey. A monkey might be more fitting actually.
Democratic senator Carl Levin, from Michigan called the system for getting a nominee "irrational". It's irrational on several levels. First of all, I am loathed to admit I agree with him elections should be held on the same day in all states instead of having it spread out over months. This does give an advantage to earlier states, I don't care what logic one wants to argue, it's a bad system and that's true on the Republican side as well. Second, I've long said that people should run regardless of party (like in the old days) and the person with the most votes would be president and the one with the 2nd most votes would be vice president, again regardless of party. This is because I agree with Washington that political parties are of the devil, that's not quite what he said but it's the same idea. Michigan then came up with a "compromise", which isn't really a compromise by any means of the imagination.
Under the Michigan compromise, the Michigan and Florida delegations are seated but they get half a vote. What's the point in half a vote, does anyone else see the irrationality here? It's still disenfranchising the votes of both states, but now we have to put on a face that we're happy with the idea. The party wants to claim this is a move towards unity, but is it really? I mean the Michigan delegates were divided in a way that makes very little sense to me. Obama gets 59 and Clinton gets 69, but they're each worth half a vote. Florida had an equally ridiculous concept for its delegates. It would have been more rational to divide out all the delegates equally and have them either worth half a vote or give them full voting rights. After all Obama followed the rules and shouldn't be penalized for this.
A much more rational system for nominating would be to just have conventions. Have delegates to the convention and no primaries and let them pick the nominee. This way people can vote in the general election, but everyone can vote on an equal footing, and winner takes all is much better than proportional divisions. These proportional divisions are ridiculous, and I feel the same way about the super delegates.
Pandora's box has been opened though and this leaves this election season with a bad taste. It's unfortunate, because the reality is Obama is very capable and it's not his fault these things have gone on, Clinton is an opportunist and will either have him assassinated or will cry foul play all the way to the Supreme Court like someone else we know to get the nomination. She will do whatever she has to do now that she has been given a foot hold, plus the number of delegates needed has now been increased in an attempt to level the playing field. Why level it when she is still over 170 delegates behind? It's basic historic precedent, black men have always gotten things before women and why should being elected president be any different.
Obama's administration doesn't strike me as being any worse than what we've had for the last 8 years, but I'm not sure who he'd want his cabinet for various positions so I can't really comment a lot here. Clinton's administration would probably mirror her husband's and NAFTA was a bad idea then and is a bad idea now. Michigan was the 2nd hardest hit with NAFTA losses and it's completely unfair that the issue was handled the way it was under Clinton and Bush both. I could say the same for the way each president has handled the war on terrorism as well, but I'll save that.
The whole electoral process has become irrational in this country and now we have irrational delegate counts, we now increase delegate counts for the Hell of it etc. We do all sorts of ridiculous things in the name of trying to be fair and give everyone a voice, but having state conventions on the same day, and then having a national convention to make the nomination official would be a much more rational plan, or even having different state conventions and not releasing the results until the national conventions. Primaries and then conventions seem to be antiquated ways for determining a nominee, especially when neither is productive and the season gets stretched out so much.
I for one, can't wait for this election season to end. I am sick and tired of the whole thing and I am relieved that my party doesn't stoop to these levels. These tactics are just an example of why both parties are made up of microcephalic pissant peons that should fix their cranial rectal inversion.
In conclusion, when I ran for office as a Libertarian we didn't have these kinds of issues. I think though that Obama shouldn't be penalized for the party being a bunch of morons. Obama and McCain are both capable and should be evaluated on their own merits, I just prefer Libertarian ideals and will be voting accordingly. Statements that I am throwing away my vote by doing so will be removed.
Until next time RAF :)
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Intro to Politics
I have been asked by numerous people that befriended me on my journey to freedom, how I became involved in politics. So I've decided it might make a funny blog post to share this with everyone.
I first became involved with politics in the 1980s. Maybe even before that as at one point my parents used to take my brother and I on demonstrations with them, and I was born in 1977 and he was born in 1979. So, that's the short answer, but how did I become actively involved in politics, this is a second issue that's pretty amusing actually.
I was watching TV one day, and for the umpteenth time my favorite TV show, the Cosby Show had been pre-empted by a presidential press conference. Naturally, I wasn't allowed to watch it my mother hated Reagan after all she didn't want me to be corrupted by the logical arguments he'd be making. I became incensed about this, and she told me to write the president. Part of me thought this idea was ridiculous, I was a child and children don't vote why would he write me back? After all it isn't as if I was writing to him about nuclear weapons or something of substance. I mean would he really move his conferences for me?
I deliberated about this for a few days and then decided to go ahead and write the president. I'm thinking this was early 1986 or maybe it was 1985. I can't remember exactly, I met Reagan in 1986 and I hadn't met him yet when I did this. Anyway, I wrote the president a letter. It went something like this "Dear President Reagan: My name is Rebecca and I am 8-9 years old (whichever I was then). I'd really appreciate it if you would please move your press conferences. I've been trying to watch the Cosby Show for several weeks now and you've been interfering with my ability to do this..." I can't remember all of it, and this is probably not the entire verbatim version. I went to the post office with my mother to mail my letter, and everyone asked me what I was writing the president about. I think they found it funny that a child would take the time to write, let alone about such a topic as this...I mean it's a TV show, but for me it was more than that.
A few weeks later I got a letter back from President Reagan. I had wanted to keep it, but I wasn't able to do so because my mother ultimately threw it out. I found out a few years ago this was written on personal stationary. This is also most likely not the entire verbatim letter, but Reagan basically said, "Dear Rebecca: Thank you for taking the time to write me about this important topic (I think maybe he was mocking me). I have to hold my press conferences when most Americans will be watching and it so happens this is during the Cosby Show. Perhaps you would be willing to watch my press conferences and become involved in the political process. I am moved that a child of your age would take the time to write me...."
Later in 1986 I would be selected to go to a rally in New Jersey where Reagan would be at. He waved at me, I think maybe we even shook hands at the event afterwards. I never told him that I was the child who wrote him about the topic of the Cosby Show. I was super excited to be able to greet the motorcade though.
This was a very gratifying experience, as I was touched that he wrote me back personally, I always felt he had done so himself since it was signed Ronald Reagan. My mother tried to convince me that it was an aid that did it, but I was steadfast in my conviction that it was in fact Reagan who wrote me back. I was also gratified with the way he asked me to become involved in the political process. I thought that was just totally cool, of course I didn't know back then that Youth for Reagan is what won him the election and how much power young people really have. I just loved the fact that he had made this comment to me.
I was sparked onto a lifetime of civil awareness by this interaction. My desire to become an internationalist came much later, in the 1990s actually, but that's a rather dull story so I will keep it to myself unless anyone asks for me to tell it.
RAF
I first became involved with politics in the 1980s. Maybe even before that as at one point my parents used to take my brother and I on demonstrations with them, and I was born in 1977 and he was born in 1979. So, that's the short answer, but how did I become actively involved in politics, this is a second issue that's pretty amusing actually.
I was watching TV one day, and for the umpteenth time my favorite TV show, the Cosby Show had been pre-empted by a presidential press conference. Naturally, I wasn't allowed to watch it my mother hated Reagan after all she didn't want me to be corrupted by the logical arguments he'd be making. I became incensed about this, and she told me to write the president. Part of me thought this idea was ridiculous, I was a child and children don't vote why would he write me back? After all it isn't as if I was writing to him about nuclear weapons or something of substance. I mean would he really move his conferences for me?
I deliberated about this for a few days and then decided to go ahead and write the president. I'm thinking this was early 1986 or maybe it was 1985. I can't remember exactly, I met Reagan in 1986 and I hadn't met him yet when I did this. Anyway, I wrote the president a letter. It went something like this "Dear President Reagan: My name is Rebecca and I am 8-9 years old (whichever I was then). I'd really appreciate it if you would please move your press conferences. I've been trying to watch the Cosby Show for several weeks now and you've been interfering with my ability to do this..." I can't remember all of it, and this is probably not the entire verbatim version. I went to the post office with my mother to mail my letter, and everyone asked me what I was writing the president about. I think they found it funny that a child would take the time to write, let alone about such a topic as this...I mean it's a TV show, but for me it was more than that.
A few weeks later I got a letter back from President Reagan. I had wanted to keep it, but I wasn't able to do so because my mother ultimately threw it out. I found out a few years ago this was written on personal stationary. This is also most likely not the entire verbatim letter, but Reagan basically said, "Dear Rebecca: Thank you for taking the time to write me about this important topic (I think maybe he was mocking me). I have to hold my press conferences when most Americans will be watching and it so happens this is during the Cosby Show. Perhaps you would be willing to watch my press conferences and become involved in the political process. I am moved that a child of your age would take the time to write me...."
Later in 1986 I would be selected to go to a rally in New Jersey where Reagan would be at. He waved at me, I think maybe we even shook hands at the event afterwards. I never told him that I was the child who wrote him about the topic of the Cosby Show. I was super excited to be able to greet the motorcade though.
This was a very gratifying experience, as I was touched that he wrote me back personally, I always felt he had done so himself since it was signed Ronald Reagan. My mother tried to convince me that it was an aid that did it, but I was steadfast in my conviction that it was in fact Reagan who wrote me back. I was also gratified with the way he asked me to become involved in the political process. I thought that was just totally cool, of course I didn't know back then that Youth for Reagan is what won him the election and how much power young people really have. I just loved the fact that he had made this comment to me.
I was sparked onto a lifetime of civil awareness by this interaction. My desire to become an internationalist came much later, in the 1990s actually, but that's a rather dull story so I will keep it to myself unless anyone asks for me to tell it.
RAF
Monday, May 19, 2008
What a strange time we live in, or maybe it's just that I live in a very strange time. I find myself with an abundance of things to say and no words to say them with, or ways to really flesh out what I'd like to say. So, I will post about what I feel I am able to discuss intelligently. Namely, my dear friend Chess Novice's allegations regarding spoiling my enjoyment of films. First of all the idea of him as a Chess Novice is really insane because he's been playing chess longer than I remember knowing him, and that's quite a long time ago now.
First of all, it is correct to assert that I have an unequivocal aversion to having my enjoyment of films spoiled. However, it is not so easily done. Your summary was of things and contexts that didn't really affect me regarding this film, and perhaps it is because you don't know of my love for this particular story.
I have had an ongoing love affair with this particular book chronicle for quite some time. All seven have a special place in my heart, and I do so hope they will make all 7 of them into movies, but this particular one has long been my favorite. I can't really explain why, in fact until I saw the movie I had no idea why and now I do have some idea.
First of all, the story of this chronicle is perhaps on of the most action packed of them all, and I really enjoyed the way it was envisioned by the film makers. Moreover, the themes in this chronicle are outlined very nicely by my friend, and so it is not the themes that I find so fascinating.
What I find fascinating is the actual content of the movie. "You're not lost, you're going the wrong way" there's something very interesting in that quote that I can't quite put my finger on here, I know what it is but to explain it would require too much energy and I am getting lazy in my old age.
Also, it's interesting that throughout my childhood I was constantly corrected about my feelings regarding Aslan. I always assumed Aslan was God, yet I was constantly told that everything was a Christian allegory and that Aslan was Christ. Interesting, maybe it is my transition out of Christianity, but when the sea swallowed up the Talmarines it reminded me more of Passover than anything Jesus ever did. Maybe I just don't understand the deep hidden Christian meaning the Lewis was going for in the book?
Many of these things strike me as interesting, but I'd rather not continue down this path. I have some political commentaries to make and perhaps I will do that later but at the present I just don't have the energy to deal with anyone or anything.
RAF
First of all, it is correct to assert that I have an unequivocal aversion to having my enjoyment of films spoiled. However, it is not so easily done. Your summary was of things and contexts that didn't really affect me regarding this film, and perhaps it is because you don't know of my love for this particular story.
I have had an ongoing love affair with this particular book chronicle for quite some time. All seven have a special place in my heart, and I do so hope they will make all 7 of them into movies, but this particular one has long been my favorite. I can't really explain why, in fact until I saw the movie I had no idea why and now I do have some idea.
First of all, the story of this chronicle is perhaps on of the most action packed of them all, and I really enjoyed the way it was envisioned by the film makers. Moreover, the themes in this chronicle are outlined very nicely by my friend, and so it is not the themes that I find so fascinating.
What I find fascinating is the actual content of the movie. "You're not lost, you're going the wrong way" there's something very interesting in that quote that I can't quite put my finger on here, I know what it is but to explain it would require too much energy and I am getting lazy in my old age.
Also, it's interesting that throughout my childhood I was constantly corrected about my feelings regarding Aslan. I always assumed Aslan was God, yet I was constantly told that everything was a Christian allegory and that Aslan was Christ. Interesting, maybe it is my transition out of Christianity, but when the sea swallowed up the Talmarines it reminded me more of Passover than anything Jesus ever did. Maybe I just don't understand the deep hidden Christian meaning the Lewis was going for in the book?
Many of these things strike me as interesting, but I'd rather not continue down this path. I have some political commentaries to make and perhaps I will do that later but at the present I just don't have the energy to deal with anyone or anything.
RAF
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Yom Heudelet Tov!
Since the 5th of Iyaar this year is on a Sabbath this year, the parties are going on now. Happy Birthday to Israel. It exists simply by a miracle, there is no other explanation for the way our people have managed to survive all of the persecutions of previous generations, and also of the last 60 years in order to maintain a blooming flower in the desert and a beautiful tradition. It is amazing the way G-d has blessed this nation, and it really must be true, He who guards Israel never slumbers. I wish I had that kind of peace in my life presently, but perhaps with time it will come. There is only so much we can do as individuals and as communities. The community of Israel has always been a complex one, and will most likely get only more complex in years to come.
I am planning to visit my family in Israel, it is the only family I have left. Most of them are not blood to me, although I suppose with my latent Jewishness as they call it that my grandfather has given to me, they would be blood. Anyway sometimes water is thicker than blood. I was hoping to be in Israel for Purim, and then Passover, and then 60th anniversary, now I think I will shoot for Chanukah but hopefully be there far earlier. All of these days are commemorating to great divine presence and works. It is a way to honor myself, and others of course. My first trip, I can't wait. I'm like a little kid with anticipation about the entire situation.
It's been suggested to me that I should go and not return, I don't know what will happen, but I do know it'll be a magical time as this is a magical time for our people. It really is true in every generation there are those that rise up to destroy us, but we are always rescued from it. I haven't yet seen this in my own life, but perhaps going to Israel will help with that a little bit.
Malka
I am planning to visit my family in Israel, it is the only family I have left. Most of them are not blood to me, although I suppose with my latent Jewishness as they call it that my grandfather has given to me, they would be blood. Anyway sometimes water is thicker than blood. I was hoping to be in Israel for Purim, and then Passover, and then 60th anniversary, now I think I will shoot for Chanukah but hopefully be there far earlier. All of these days are commemorating to great divine presence and works. It is a way to honor myself, and others of course. My first trip, I can't wait. I'm like a little kid with anticipation about the entire situation.
It's been suggested to me that I should go and not return, I don't know what will happen, but I do know it'll be a magical time as this is a magical time for our people. It really is true in every generation there are those that rise up to destroy us, but we are always rescued from it. I haven't yet seen this in my own life, but perhaps going to Israel will help with that a little bit.
Malka
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Fear
I can't believe it has been so long since I last posted. The reality is I am living in the land of fear, and I have no idea where to cling to now that I have entered it. I am deeply lost in this land of fear I don't know what I will do. I can't seem to get out and I am so wounded that I can't even recognize help when and if it were to arrive. I find myself trying very hard to keep myself on the straight narrow/sane part of things but that's becoming more and more difficult. I feel myself becoming something else, or maybe someone else. I just feel so far lost from myself and who I am, who I want(ed) to be. I find that my gift for guiding others is completely lost on myself during this crisis. I hope that it will be a short lived crisis because there are other things that I need to get done with my life. I don't have time to sit in fear and wait, yet here I am paralyzed by it.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Death of an Icon
My dear friends,
I have recently been informed of a terrible event in my life. One of my best friends from college has died. He was a great man, from a long line of great men. When we would sit and talk he would really focus on what I was saying, and then he even took my advice on his career choice. At the time of his death he was First Secretary of the Embassy of South Africa to Sudan. He died while visiting London of Cerebral Malaria, and was the tender age of 41. What makes him unique is that despite his being Walter Sisulu's grandson he was very down to earth. In fact, I always imagined that if I had met his grandfather they'd be very much alike. He was soft-spoken and I think had potential to do a lot of great work for his country and the world. I am honored to have nurtured and encouraged him to become the man I am sure he was before his death, and I am sure we will all feel a void and miss him in the future. Already the world seems like a darker place. I know though that he is now with his grandfather and perhaps they will both look over me.
I have recently been informed of a terrible event in my life. One of my best friends from college has died. He was a great man, from a long line of great men. When we would sit and talk he would really focus on what I was saying, and then he even took my advice on his career choice. At the time of his death he was First Secretary of the Embassy of South Africa to Sudan. He died while visiting London of Cerebral Malaria, and was the tender age of 41. What makes him unique is that despite his being Walter Sisulu's grandson he was very down to earth. In fact, I always imagined that if I had met his grandfather they'd be very much alike. He was soft-spoken and I think had potential to do a lot of great work for his country and the world. I am honored to have nurtured and encouraged him to become the man I am sure he was before his death, and I am sure we will all feel a void and miss him in the future. Already the world seems like a darker place. I know though that he is now with his grandfather and perhaps they will both look over me.
Friday, April 4, 2008
Spring is a time of renewal, and new beginnings, or so they say. I can't believe it is already April. This April marks a year in my journey to a divorce, or as a friend of mine says, "Let's call it rectifying a mistake" this also marks a time that I began keeping this blog, although I admit I have been really poor at keeping up with the posts on it. This is in part due to my inability to find topics of interest, but also because of my lack of interest in a number of things that I used to find fascinating. Blogging being one of those things, additionally if I leave a loose trail I don't have to worry about the assholes in the world causing me additional pain and suffering. This year has been a very painful one, a very difficult one, and there as of yet is no end in sight.
As I think about the things I need to say and do to carry my dearly beloved friend through his own crisis, I am reminded of the things I need to say and do for myself. This is partly because of how similar we are, but it is also because we find ourselves disturbed by similar issues, the difference is of course that he has much more support for what he is going through than I do. He also has me, and I am particularly good at figuring out what he needs and giving it to him. Sometimes I jokingly say he is my other half, in many ways this is a joke and in other ways I am deadly serious when I say it.
This spring I am hoping for a time of renewal for my own spirit and my own life. I will be planning my relocation, my trip home, and most importantly forging a new identity for myself. This new identity will keep me safe, secure, and will carry with it all the affections that I have for myself, and for my family. My new family, the family that has gotten me through a very challenging time period. Many people are in this family, but very few can I be connected to in a tangible way. Everyone is of course equally important, and a variety of things will impact whom I am connected to and how this will play out.
In a couple weeks I will post a follow up, and God willing a post script to the drama that has been going on. I might even explain in more depth why I changed my blog and stuff like that. I hope and pray that I will be OK soon, and until then I will find my home in the 23rd psalm.
May you find what brings peace to you. I find that today has been a much more peaceful day than yesterday, even with its history. I'm a little bit tired of the hypocracy of all the candidates related to MLK's assassination, but it is what it is. Like the person said at McCain's speech, we all make mistakes.
Blessings to all of you, as you go along your journey. I will do another post as soon as I find something to say or in a couple weeks, whichever comes up first.
Malka
As I think about the things I need to say and do to carry my dearly beloved friend through his own crisis, I am reminded of the things I need to say and do for myself. This is partly because of how similar we are, but it is also because we find ourselves disturbed by similar issues, the difference is of course that he has much more support for what he is going through than I do. He also has me, and I am particularly good at figuring out what he needs and giving it to him. Sometimes I jokingly say he is my other half, in many ways this is a joke and in other ways I am deadly serious when I say it.
This spring I am hoping for a time of renewal for my own spirit and my own life. I will be planning my relocation, my trip home, and most importantly forging a new identity for myself. This new identity will keep me safe, secure, and will carry with it all the affections that I have for myself, and for my family. My new family, the family that has gotten me through a very challenging time period. Many people are in this family, but very few can I be connected to in a tangible way. Everyone is of course equally important, and a variety of things will impact whom I am connected to and how this will play out.
In a couple weeks I will post a follow up, and God willing a post script to the drama that has been going on. I might even explain in more depth why I changed my blog and stuff like that. I hope and pray that I will be OK soon, and until then I will find my home in the 23rd psalm.
May you find what brings peace to you. I find that today has been a much more peaceful day than yesterday, even with its history. I'm a little bit tired of the hypocracy of all the candidates related to MLK's assassination, but it is what it is. Like the person said at McCain's speech, we all make mistakes.
Blessings to all of you, as you go along your journey. I will do another post as soon as I find something to say or in a couple weeks, whichever comes up first.
Malka
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Several months ago a recruiter I was working with contacted me regarding a possible interview with Bear Stearns. I thought this was a fantastic opportunity and contacted another firm I have been working with and asked them to please get whatever information they could find regarding Bear and Stearns. To my shock and horror, I discovered that something like 55% of the assets for this company are held in Saudi Arabia. Amalek! If you don't understand the significance of Amalek you might want to look it up. I was going to give the precise numbers, but I am having trouble with my email box right now. I have to ask though WHY are we bailing out a company owned by the Saudis? We know that Saudi Arabia funds terrorism and we give them a bunch of money anyway, so WHY give them more money? I am uncomfortable with the idea of my tax dollars going to bail out a company owned by a terrorist state. I understand the economic implications, but damn it...WTF is going on here? Amalek is not supposed to be bailed out...it is supposed to be wiped off the map. May Amalek die soon.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Please answer on your Blog. Choose five to pass this Meme forward. Ready, steady, go!
1) President George W. Bush or President William Clinton? You must answer 1a and 1b.
George W. Bush
1a) Give 3 issues why you support your guy:
Somewhere in Time
3) Favorite Sci-fi TV show?
Highlander
4) Favorite Alternate History story (movie, TV or book)?
I don't think I've read any of these kinds of stories.
5) Best American Legislator? (if overseas, your local Legislators)
Alive or dead?
6) Best Foreign Legislator? (if overseas, this is where you can choose American legislators)
I choose Rabin. What a loss that was...Lebed also a loss, and Vladimir Putin :)
7) Favorite Sci-fi scene? (Youtube it if you can)
Actually it's from Forever Knight, which I also loved to watch.
8) Pitch a cross-over between two sci-fi shows/movies/etc.:
McCloud turns into a vampire cop.
9) Who will win the Democratic Presidential Primary? Why?
Senator Obama. He has the general votes. The delegates from Florida and Michigan will most likely be recast for him and he will need to win the primary or people will get angry. Funny that Clinton is already talking about having him as her VP. How ridiculous he has the delegates!
10) Will Gordon Brown call an election before 2010?
No.
11) Favorite Steampunk, Cyberpunk or Post-Cyberpunk novel, comic, book or movie?
I'm going to go with Clockwork Orange here although it scared me half to death. I think it classes as one of these.
12) Best Pizza place? Please provide the link.
I don't really have a link for the best pizza place. I haven't had pizza in a year.
1) President George W. Bush or President William Clinton? You must answer 1a and 1b.
George W. Bush
1a) Give 3 issues why you support your guy:
- Hold positions that are closer to my personal views than Clinton did, like he recognizes NAFTA for the fuck up it is.
- Strong foreign policy, right or wrong he stands up for what he believes.
- He's pretty entertaining when he gives a speech.
- He'll help Hillary not to get elected as much as tries to help her win.
- He's no longer in office.
- He kept us entertained with his scandals.
Somewhere in Time
3) Favorite Sci-fi TV show?
Highlander
4) Favorite Alternate History story (movie, TV or book)?
I don't think I've read any of these kinds of stories.
5) Best American Legislator? (if overseas, your local Legislators)
Alive or dead?
6) Best Foreign Legislator? (if overseas, this is where you can choose American legislators)
I choose Rabin. What a loss that was...Lebed also a loss, and Vladimir Putin :)
7) Favorite Sci-fi scene? (Youtube it if you can)
Actually it's from Forever Knight, which I also loved to watch.
8) Pitch a cross-over between two sci-fi shows/movies/etc.:
McCloud turns into a vampire cop.
9) Who will win the Democratic Presidential Primary? Why?
Senator Obama. He has the general votes. The delegates from Florida and Michigan will most likely be recast for him and he will need to win the primary or people will get angry. Funny that Clinton is already talking about having him as her VP. How ridiculous he has the delegates!
10) Will Gordon Brown call an election before 2010?
No.
11) Favorite Steampunk, Cyberpunk or Post-Cyberpunk novel, comic, book or movie?
I'm going to go with Clockwork Orange here although it scared me half to death. I think it classes as one of these.
12) Best Pizza place? Please provide the link.
I don't really have a link for the best pizza place. I haven't had pizza in a year.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
War, Peace, and Everything in between...
Alright, I've been suffering my own case of writers block, but a new post has been requested and I see it has been almost 3 months since my last post. I can't believe it has been almost that long. So much has been going on, and yet I've had nothing to say. So here's my poor attempt at coming out of my writer's block.
War:
We are fast approaching the festival of Purim. Purim is a celebration honoring Queen Esther and her saving the Jews of Persia from extermination. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the Iranians have always tried to kill us and yet we are still here and we are more successful than they are. Maybe they should focus their energy on trying to emulate us instead of genocide and then they'd have a nicer country. Iran still has 20,000 Jews living there and they take care of Esther's grave. I find that to be somewhat Ironic. They are still trying to kill us, yet they care for the grave of the woman who stopped them all those years ago.
I have never seen Purim celebrated and I was hoping to have been in Israel for it, however due to circumstances beyond my control I find myself still in the US and in a state of panic for it. My new goal is to be in Israel for Pessach.
This isn't the end of the world as I will find myself visiting my new family at the synagogue for Purim, assuming they have the invitations printed for the party. I am looking forward to the fact that it recognizes the waste the war would have been, and it leads to a peace. I also think it is cool that the story is so beautiful. It has everything a good story does. I sometimes feel like Haman is coming after me so I particularly enjoy this story at this time, with Haman getting his ass kicked. I made some Hamantaschen they came out spectacularly. Untraditionally but that's OK, I'm not a Jew yet so I don't have to be so strict.
Peace:
Pessach is another one of these sort of war and peace holidays. There is a different sense of war of course because of the Egyptians, but they even go after the Israelites with an army so that still has a military component. My abba tells me that Mitzryiam has two forms of oppression physical and spiritual.
Unlike Purim, I have seen Pessach celebrated numerous times. I love it, it is by far my favorite holiday. I have a special connection to it this year given the events of my life. There is something really peaceful and beautiful about reading this story and looking at how awesome God really is. God really does do wonderous things, and it is sometimes really amazing to watch this process.
It's been a very trying exodus for me, but I have found my constant companion to be God, and that also some angelic presences were sent to help me with this process in the form of some really good friends. Some I had before, some I met during, all that I will keep after. I have also been blessed with some new family along the road. I am grateful for that, it has kept me from going under many times.
Family is so important, and I find myself having to reconstruct so much. I'm sure it was that way for a lot of people in the desert and in other historical time periods. I know I am sick of wandering the desert, but I am hoping that this time period in the wilderness will be ending shortly. In the meantime I am grateful to those that have so kindly tolerated the ups, downs, and other assorted directions that the roller coaster ride has moved in over the past year. It has been very helpful to me that I have been able to count on some people to not be problematic.
I have a few other wars now that I am trying to find peace through, I know peace can sometimes only be found on the other side of war and so I hope that the war can end soon. It is ironic I was born in Adar which means fire.
Everything in between:
Not much to report on this end of things. My dear friend has gotten back into contact with me, this makes me feel a little more secure. I feel extremely insecure and so it makes me feel better to think that I am important enough to have contact again.
I am panicking about the economic situation I find myself in as well as the spiritual and emotional ones. I am sure that this will pass eventually and I pray that it will be ending very soon.
War:
We are fast approaching the festival of Purim. Purim is a celebration honoring Queen Esther and her saving the Jews of Persia from extermination. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the Iranians have always tried to kill us and yet we are still here and we are more successful than they are. Maybe they should focus their energy on trying to emulate us instead of genocide and then they'd have a nicer country. Iran still has 20,000 Jews living there and they take care of Esther's grave. I find that to be somewhat Ironic. They are still trying to kill us, yet they care for the grave of the woman who stopped them all those years ago.
I have never seen Purim celebrated and I was hoping to have been in Israel for it, however due to circumstances beyond my control I find myself still in the US and in a state of panic for it. My new goal is to be in Israel for Pessach.
This isn't the end of the world as I will find myself visiting my new family at the synagogue for Purim, assuming they have the invitations printed for the party. I am looking forward to the fact that it recognizes the waste the war would have been, and it leads to a peace. I also think it is cool that the story is so beautiful. It has everything a good story does. I sometimes feel like Haman is coming after me so I particularly enjoy this story at this time, with Haman getting his ass kicked. I made some Hamantaschen they came out spectacularly. Untraditionally but that's OK, I'm not a Jew yet so I don't have to be so strict.
Peace:
Pessach is another one of these sort of war and peace holidays. There is a different sense of war of course because of the Egyptians, but they even go after the Israelites with an army so that still has a military component. My abba tells me that Mitzryiam has two forms of oppression physical and spiritual.
Unlike Purim, I have seen Pessach celebrated numerous times. I love it, it is by far my favorite holiday. I have a special connection to it this year given the events of my life. There is something really peaceful and beautiful about reading this story and looking at how awesome God really is. God really does do wonderous things, and it is sometimes really amazing to watch this process.
It's been a very trying exodus for me, but I have found my constant companion to be God, and that also some angelic presences were sent to help me with this process in the form of some really good friends. Some I had before, some I met during, all that I will keep after. I have also been blessed with some new family along the road. I am grateful for that, it has kept me from going under many times.
Family is so important, and I find myself having to reconstruct so much. I'm sure it was that way for a lot of people in the desert and in other historical time periods. I know I am sick of wandering the desert, but I am hoping that this time period in the wilderness will be ending shortly. In the meantime I am grateful to those that have so kindly tolerated the ups, downs, and other assorted directions that the roller coaster ride has moved in over the past year. It has been very helpful to me that I have been able to count on some people to not be problematic.
I have a few other wars now that I am trying to find peace through, I know peace can sometimes only be found on the other side of war and so I hope that the war can end soon. It is ironic I was born in Adar which means fire.
Everything in between:
Not much to report on this end of things. My dear friend has gotten back into contact with me, this makes me feel a little more secure. I feel extremely insecure and so it makes me feel better to think that I am important enough to have contact again.
I am panicking about the economic situation I find myself in as well as the spiritual and emotional ones. I am sure that this will pass eventually and I pray that it will be ending very soon.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Traitors
The roots of the traitorous conspiracy came to light last night. When I was a little girl, my dad had a picture of Elizabeth I above my bed and some other Elizabethan things. So in the spirit of Elizabeth, may their heads all find comfortable pikes to rest upon. I can now openly out these traitors as the court dealings have closed themselves off. I am debating whether or not I will openly name these traitors for what they are or if I will let them remain in darkness as they are very dark and deserve to remain within their own evil beings.
Traitors have a long standing political presence and must always be dealt with swiftly and severely, for if this is not the case then things will become a greater problem for the world. One must purge traitors from the ranks or face the consequences, so I have purged ALL of these traitors from my life.
Happy New Year to me, may I have peace in my life and may I have people in my life that will not be traitors always.
Traitors have a long standing political presence and must always be dealt with swiftly and severely, for if this is not the case then things will become a greater problem for the world. One must purge traitors from the ranks or face the consequences, so I have purged ALL of these traitors from my life.
Happy New Year to me, may I have peace in my life and may I have people in my life that will not be traitors always.
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